Trust was the oddest thing that I had to deal with for quite a while this year. I am not someone who looks at the art of friendship in a bad light. In fact, I cherish a lot of it that it has to offer. How can we know if we are walking the right path? It is too hard to realize that until it is too late, perhaps.
I have realized that one can never know if somebody can be trusted, unless you risk it, go ahead and place your faith on that person. It is always a matter of trial and error. And this indeed starts to bring trouble to your doorstep when you are out there in the world, making friends, hoping that the conflicts with your personal demons will turn out right. Let’s face it, relationships like these matter, especially if you are somewhere in your teens, studying at college, spending quality time outside your homes, hoping to someday perhaps ‘change the world’. Lunch breaks, night outs, assignment panic, exam schedules, everything begins to take priority around the folk you call as friends. Even if you are an introvert, you end up being a part of a social group at some point in your life.
You start to believe in your friends and what can bear out of the relationship that you share with them. I had this deep conversation with a friend yesterday who was disturbed by the choices she had made in life. She was regretful about some of the people that she once knew. I could only nod in understanding, although it is, at any point, hard to fathom what the person is feeling when it comes to issues like betrayal, lies, fights, and everything dark and beyond that.
Upon giving it a deeper thought, I realized that nothing can be done about it, really. I belong to one of the most populated countries in the world. There are people everywhere. People that you need to interact with in order to get something done. If your trust is betrayed, everything feels like it is tumbling off the roof. Revenge and comebacks begin to get redundant. You can only choose to let it go.
It is hard to face reality at times, when you have realized some of the things you have had to deal with just for the sake of another friend. What you once believed to be a meaningful relationship is now nothing but a balloon filled with thin air. It seems so stupid that you had bothered to give the time that you had for that person.
Nothing can be done about such betrayal of faith, apart from learning from it and moving on. I maybe one of those who betrayed your trust, and perhaps I am sorry. But some choices are hard, and are meant to be taken, in spite of the promises that are broken thanks to which.
This is the first week of December, 2013, and I hope you are having a good time, where ever you are. We can only continue to hang where we are, and breathe. You are never alone, as long as you hope, keep your head up and smile for the world wants to see more of that.
– shaun d’souza
Connect with me @hunchbakdsouza